I had an "aha" moment this morning. If I was in my class, I'd stop and hit the gong. I guess this is my gong. In my classroom, students who have an "aha" moment can get up in the middle of a lesson to hit the gong, to signify that they learned something. Then we give them applause to celebrate. Sometimes, they learn something new that everyone already knew, but it doesn't matter, because they finally got it.
Well, I finally got it this morning. And that is: I can't control everything, and almost as importantly can't force things either. Anybody else have this problem? You want it the way you want it, and you want it now. That isn't the way the world works, so I'm finally owning up to that and accepting it.
Want to know what really made me see that I can't force things? Seeing a mother deer and her fawn in the park last night, for another God moment. It was probably the coolest thing I've ever seen. While walking with a friend Corey, he stopped us when he saw the mother only twenty feet from us. We froze and for the next half an hour watched as her fawn ran toward her, nursed for a minute and then continued their wondering in the forest, all as they got closer to us. At the end, this mother and fawn were within 5-6 feet of us. We stood in awe the whole time.
And here's thing: I didn't force that to happen or control any of it. And that is the way it is for these God moments that have been occuring over the last many months. None of them were me forcing the issue - they all came when I wasn't forcing the issue.
Hmm, there's a lesson there. I'm letting that sink in today.
Blessings everyone! XO